Regret

The day after we reported the suspected crime against our child we thought the "right" thing to do would be to let Eddie Rojas and Jim Cameron know that we chose to involve the police. They were our pastor and elder. I deeply regret giving them the heads-up. We had no idea just how intertwined Eddie Rojas was with his son's deviant sexual behavior. We trusted the Rojas family. We trusted Eddie and Kathy Rojas. I believe everyone at the time actually felt sorry for Eddie and Kathy. No one in the general congregation and I mean NO ONE knew that both Eddie, Kathy along with Jairus knew that Patrick had a history of sexually abusing minor children. And it didn't help that their family just continued on with normal life and their normal activities as if nothing serious had transpired.

Our family on the other hand was devastated. Our lives would never be the same,our faith would never be the same, our ability to trust would be forever altered.

What good are we if in a moment of real need we deflect, distant ourselves, or ignore the issue?


 I don't want to ever be that person!

For the first two weeks our family was trying to figure out how to maneuver through all of what was happening. Initially, we stated that we didn't want our family named as the "victim family" when the leadership spoke of the matter. We wanted to try and control who knew it was our family for the simple reason of protecting our child's privacy. Fairly soon we decided we didn't have anything to hide and communicated to the leadership that it didn't matter to us who knew it was our family. (About a week after the discovery the leadership had a meeting and told the congregation that there had been "inappropriate affection" between Patrick Rojas and a child in the congregation. They informed the church members that the authorities were involved.)

When we started to tell our close family and friends the reactions were so diverse. I would start by saying that we called 911 to report sexual abuse by Patrick Rojas against one of our children. It was always disbelief  at first but after that some would actually start to cry and show deep concern for our child and family.  They would want to listen, ask questions, they would be real.

Some reactions were hurtful! I had a few people after the initial shock actually turn their concern towards Patrick. No kidding, one comment was, "Well he better get a good lawyer, the state will be out to get him."

Another one went right into rantings of how "The Rojas ways weren't all that great after all, now were they?"

In those moments, I was struck by the fact that the individual in front of me really hadn't heard me. I had just told them I had to call 911 because my child had been sexually molested by Patrick.

The comments I resent the most were the ones where the person would say, "At least that's all he did, it could have been worse."

I wanted to scream, WHAT IS WORSE?" (Any form of sexual abuse is devastating!)

These people just didn't get it! I think this is when I started to shut down inside, to hunker down.

Part of me died inside.

*Partly from the "Reactions" post.

911 Call

The following 24hrs after the emergency meeting were horrible, as you might imagine.

...it started to play back in my head....I kept thinking, are we making too much out of this? In the spirit of not being a "gossiper" we didn't let anyone else in our church or family know what we just discovered. (secrecy gives the sex offender power)

A name popped in my head, it was someone I could call that could help me process what we just discovered and would tell me if we were making something out of nothing. She has a masters in psychology and is a Christian. She would know what she was talking about from a biblical world view which mattered to me. I hadn't spoken to this person in many years other than running into to her at a mutual friends birthday party or something like that....but I located her number and called.

Almost immediately after outlining the note and the "emergency meeting" she stated that we needed to report sexual abuse to the police. I was very hesitant and she could tell. She went on to explain a 22yr old man does not just wake up one day and fall in love with a child under 12yrs old, that Patrick most certainly had other victims with the grooming pattern he displayed towards our child. She asked if he had any sisters and expressed concern for them. (The very girls that were taken into hiding by their father, Eddie Rojas, to protect a pedophile from further prosecution.) She told me to call a sexual abuse hot line and talk anonymously with them about our situation and see if they gave us the same advice, which was to call the police! As I'm sure my friend knew the sexual assault center did in fact say we absolutely needed to call the police!

Eric and I were still struggling and praying. When I looked at my husband and said, "if it were our neighbor that we were talking about we wouldn't hesitate calling the police." The phone rang. It was my friend who said I just want to ask you one thing "If this were your neighbor you were talking about would you even hesitate to call the police?" I was blown away. (This still gives me chills, to this day, when I recall it.) I explained that I just said that exact thing to Eric. She urged us to hang up and call 911.

That is exactly what we did!


*Retelling from the original "Discovery" post.  Our Story will continue tomorrow.

Emergency Meeting

*More from the original "Discovery" post.

I still wonder why we did it this way... I wish we would have called the police immediately. Hindsight, WE SHOULD HAVE CALLED THE POLICE IMMEDIATELY. We gave the sex offender, his father and the elders time to formulate a plan and reach out for legal counsel.

But instead, Eric and I found a friend's home where our children could go and called an emergency meeting with, our former pastor, Eddie Rojas (whom is the offenders father) his wife, Kathy, Patrick, and one of our elders, Jim Cameron.

In the meeting Patrick admitted to kissing the victim on the lips multiple times while the victim was asleep in their own bedroom. With the note alone and the victims "dream like" minimal memory, charges may not have  been filed on Patrick and we would have never known just how twisted and dangerous he is. But because there were witnesses of  his admission and specifically a "non partial" witness, Jim Cameron, the admission was taken seriously when we reported it to the police. The prosecutor, Kelly Montgomery, reviewed the case and had a "gut feeling" about this one. She took the case on personally. She normally takes on the more high profile cases.

A few other things came out of the meeting that I would like to make mention of....when we read the definition of a pedophile in front of everyone immediately Eddie Rojas reached over his wife and touched Patrick on the leg and stated "one time does not make a pedophile"....and our elder, Jim Cameron, stated that he felt the "world" is too quick to label someone. Jim Cameron felt it was more like "inappropriate affection" rather than something criminal...this was the theme the elders and the Rojas family stuck with.

Another thing that always bugged me and that stuck out was when Eddie stated that he could empathize with Patrick because when Eddie was younger, 22yrs old, he had a crush on a 12yr old girl and wrote her some notes and her parents found them and told him to stop and Eddie said he did.

In the moment I pretty much sat in a chair and cried most of the time. Mrs. Rojas didn't say a word until they were leaving she hugged me and whispered, "I am so sorry it's my son." There was talk about the Rojas's disciplining Patrick and that the elders and Eddie and Patrick would need to meet to figure out what to do. Eddie wanted us to know that he would take this seriously. No mention of calling the police and reporting that a crime had occurred because you know (and I say this sarcastically) it is only "inappropriate affection" and "just a kiss". (That was forced on an 11yr old child that was asleep in their own bed by a 22yr old man.)

Now try to imagine, we were sitting with men we respect, as our pastor and elder. We were in shock and disbelief and being fed that really this wasn't that big of a matter. Definitely one that needed more discussion between Eddie and the elders but nothing beyond that. We were told basically that they would be praying for us and to let them know if we needed anything.

.....more tomorrow.

First Piece of Evidence

*Retelling from the "Discovery" post

We were having company come over the following night so our family was tidying up our home. The family we were having over ironically enough was the Rojas family. Anyway, Eric went into one of the rooms to check it out and upon inspection he found a letter inside the pillow case on one of the beds. The reaction from the child was strange so Eric came to me and we read it together.

My heart sank...there was a small torn note around the outside of the letter and here is some of what was written, "...best to tear the letter up when done reading and responding to it." ..."other notes I gave you should also be disposed of or given back to me." "This is a risky place for a mailbox....think of another place....put it there if you know I am coming or if your whole family is leaving."

Then we opened up the letter which was written on college lined paper and was two and 1/2 full pages, written 12/06......the paragraph that made me literally sick to my stomach was;

"I know that I didn't just offend you, I realize that I hurt you very deeply by what I did. I took from you something I can't ever give back......I did it because I love you. I assumed you loved me....but I guess I thought wrong".....

"......I also want to apologize for reading your diary.....since I read yours I feel as though you should read mine......"

".......I want to encourage you to grow closer to the Lord. He is more faithful than I could ever be......He has promised to be with you and never forsake you! :) "

"....P.P.S. Sometimes I feel like giving you a little gift (like gum or candy) because I want to bless you. But recently you haven't been very receptive of my efforts...."

We talked to the our child who stated their memory was very dream like and thought that Patrick kissed them.

Patrick was 22 years old and our child was 11.

What?  A kiss?  When?  How?  Really?    NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

Going Forward (Starting At The Beginning)

The appeal process is going forward. I saw it coming. Unfortunately, appealing the decision to dismiss his case is very characteristic to Patrick's behavior, thus far. But I was hopeful that the appeals court would dismiss his request to review the ruling all together....We are now waiting for Patrick to submit his briefing, at this point he is representing himself.

 I have been considering re-posting our story because there is still a wanted felon on the run, there are additional victims, of his, that have not seen justice for the crimes they endured, and a level two sex offender living freely in Port Orchard, Washington that is trying to get me to stop telling my story. To refresh your memory, I will be re-posting OUR STORY from the beginning. This is a great time to post a link to my blog and raise awareness!

 The following is from my initial post that started this blog. At the time I wrote this I had no idea I would have so much to say, that I would eventually receive tips and actually locate Eddie Rojas and family or that the actual sex offender of my child would have the audacity to sue me for telling OUR STORY.

 *I made a few minor changes to the original post: "How Can You Help?:

 We need your help in locating someone who is in hiding along with innocent minor children. There is an arrest warrant in the name of Francis Edward Rojas, AKA (Eddie Rojas) for "witness tampering." The warrant is out of Kitsap County court in Washington State, it is a nation wide warrant. Just prior to going into hiding, Eddie, was the pastor at "Peninsula Household of Faith Community Church" in Port Orchard, WA which is affiliated with the "Household of Faith Community Church's."

 In January 2007 we discovered that his adult son (whom lived under Eddie's roof) was a pedophile. I will attempt to outline the events that lead to Eddie taking his wife and 10 children into hiding, why there is a warrant for his arrest, and why you should help locate him. Our family has used all available legal channels and had hired a private detective to try and locate this man and haven't successfully found Eddie. I have reservations about using the internet but the pro's out weigh the con's....I need to know that I did not leave any reasonable possibility unexplored.

 This will be an emotional blog with a subject matter that is heinous but I can't shake the feeling that we may succeed in finding a wanted man with a felony warrant and bring healing to so many others. I have a large family and as time allows I will be posting more information, pictures, possible "hot" spots where Eddie may be in hiding along with more of our story.

 Check back to see how our REAL life story unfolds....

No, Really!

It appears that Patrick is requesting that an appellate counsel be appointed to him. No, really! Not sure if I should laugh or cry... All I know is that I am in a "wait and see" stance. Will the court accept Patrick's request for an appeal? Will the courts appoint counsel? YOUR tax dollars might be used to pay for Patrick's public appointed counsel.

Fretting over what MAY be...won't do me any good. For now, I am pushing this to the back burner and plan to enjoy this holiday with my family.

Appealing The Courts Decision

This past Friday we were served a motion to appeal the courts decision to dismiss the lawsuit Patrick and Jairus had against us. Today, we were served an amended motion to the appeal.

The kicker, it seems Patrick is representing himself. He just can't let it go.