Losing trust in ones self is devastating. When this happens insecurities run wild. This is still my biggest hurdle, learning to trust myself again. My gut.
What haunts me is the fact that I can't send my children to very many places without taking a risk that they may be sexually molested. I really can't say with certainty to my child, "You're fine, you're safe with these individuals." Most children are molested by trusted individuals in their lives. We had know the Rojas family for many years. We interacted with the family weekly. Kathy Rojas was at two of my children's births. We worshiped together. Why didn't I know just how sick their family was?
Pedophiles are master manipulators and they are everywhere. Their enablers are foolish people that choose to have a blind eye. There are stories all over the place about childhood sexual abuse. In schools, in churches, at daycare, family homes, and with trusted coaches or friends.
You can really only know and trust yourself.
Pedophiles cross all cultural, racial and economical boundaries. A pedophile can be male or female, although the number of male pedophiles grossly outnumbers the female predators.
I believe a lot of parents feel the older their child gets the less likely they are to be victimized and that is a lie. Do not buy into that lie. Without robbing your child of innocence give your children examples of ways to get out of situations that they are uncomfortable in. And when your child doesn't want to go with someone don't just dismiss that, really evaluate the situation. Don't ever believe that your children are immune from being sexual molested!
1 comment:
Hello Danielle. I want to thank you for your zealous persistence in raising awareness to make the world a safer place for girls(and boys). I totally sympathize, although not having been abused(thank you Jesus)myself I know what it's like to walk on the streets near my own home and not feel safe because I feel men lusting after me, seeing me as an object to be taken. I also want to call something to your attention, please note that I do so with the utmost respect for you, I am humbled by your fierceness to protect! You talk about how hard it is to trust, I would like to encourage you to just lay your insecurities before the feet of Jesus, lay your fears and wounds and frustrations before Him. Trust Him to make all things right, trust Him to guide you into realms of greater influence, and glades of peace in His presence. Don't let your hurt tell you that Jesus doesn't care, that He is ok with kids being molested. Cause He is not ok with it, your longing for justice has a root of the Lord in it, don't let it turn to bitterness. Rather ask the Father how He wants you to use your passion, your zeal, it is powerful, but without the love and guidance of Jesus it will not go as far as it could. Dream the impossible, He is the God of the impossible, dream of your state becoming a safe place for kids(and adults), dream of the transformation that could take place. Don't let experience tell you what's not possible, let God tell you what is possible!!! You can change the nation, just focus on going deeper with Christ, listening to His voice and obeying His loving commands. You are loved, your hurt is noticed, your cry is heard.
Much love to you, and admiration for who God created you to be!
-Miss B.J. Kingsbury
An idea-- think about writing a book on raising kids with wisdom and insight!
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