If someone asks him, ‘What are these wounds on your body?’ he will answer, ‘The wounds I was given at the house of my friends.’ Zech 13 v 6

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Going Forward

They are going forward with the deposition. It looks like it will be in late November. Truth be told, I am not surprised.

At this point I have no choice but to roll with it. Don't get me wrong, this does cause me anxiety. The anticipation will be building from now until the deposition. Wondering about what questions will be asked, whether the offender and his brother will be present, not knowing whether I will feel angry or sad and cry.

It's a job for the attorneys and I believe a game for Patrick.

I just have to remind myself, for even one family to be spared the devastation that Patrick caused our child and family, it is all worth it.

11 comments:

freddyeddy said...

What is the status of the legal fund? If you prefer to respond privately, you have my contact info.

Danielle said...

To find out info about the legal fund you can contact
Deb Llewellyn @ pie.alamode@yahoo.com.

Anonymous said...

You think Patrick thinks this is a game? Excuse me if you think I come out a little bold but, you have been painting Patrick as an evil and horrible character, screaming out hate and revenge in the name of "warning other families". Patrick is no more of a sinner than you! Have you lied before? Of course you have, should I go and warn everybody in the world that you are a lier? No. We all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God. Why then must you go proclaiming Patrick's sins as if they are more dangerous and evil then your own? I see you write over and over again this is not about forgiveness. But you say you believe in God, is not our God a forgiving God? Our God is all about forgiveness, and our lives should reflect that. If you think that God calls you to take revenge on Patrick I am afraid I must tell you that you are wrong. Do you remember a certain Bible verse "Vengeance is mine"? Forgive me I cannot remember where it is found. I pray that if you cry in that time in November, your tears will not be out of self pity but out of love for Patrick and repentance for hating him so much.

I love you and I am praying for you,
-Someone who loves you and the Rojas family.

Danielle said...

@Anonymous, I think you are somewhat confused. I have pondered as to whether I would post your recent comments...I decided to post this one in order to address you. Some of what you have written would indicate that haven't read the entire blog. You don't even correctly reference what Patrick actually did to my child in your other comments. You mention that you are young (young enough to be my daughter) maybe that is why you confuse forgiveness with erasing the consequences of ones sins. Do you not understand that if you assume and live as if Patrick is no longer a dangerous sexual predator of adolescent children you are living in a lie. Your doctrine is twisted. I am genuinely concerned about your world view. Feel free to live out your conviction to "love" Patrick but might I suggest that you stop reading my blog. Your rhetoric is wasted here.

Anonymous said...

Well even if the person who just commented is a little young, do you recall a certain verse something like "Out of the mouth of babes..."? You say the little ones doctrine is twisted, but you your self have never called readers to any verse that justifies what you do. If you believe that the child is twisting doctrine, show us the real stuff! So you think that it is your job to deal out to Patrick the consequences of his sins??? Well, please consider what I say, how about you leave the consequences of Patrick's sin for God to give to him. We are the family of God right? Let me give you a little picture:
The story starts out with a little boy who is very interested in weapons, one day he finds a pocket knife. Than he gets really curious as to what a wound looks like, and gets anxious to go to battle. He schemes for a long time and then one night, he sneaks into his little sister's room and slightly slices his sister's arm with the knife. She is a hard sleeper and does not feel anything but a little pain but keeps on sleeping. In the morning she wakes up and finds her arm is cut and then everybody in the family comes to find out what the little boy did. They are horrified! The little girl is scarred for life. The little boy's father is very angry with him, the boy is very sorry for what he did. It is soon found that he had also pricked the family dog and had poked a few other little kids with a knife earlier. The boy's dad talks to him about it, the boy then realizes what he has done, he is so, so sorry. His dad says he forgives him, but he still is going to have to be punished. So the little boy goes through many punishments, hard, very hard and sad ones. But he understands that he deserves them. His dad sees him and is pleased that the boy has changed, he is happy to see that his son is truly sorry for what he did, but he does not slack off on the punishments of course. The little girl on the other hand, is very, very angry. She goes around and tells everyone she knows "Be careful of my brother, he is a really bad boy, he is dangerous, don't be friends with him.". She thinks that the punishments her dad gave her brother were not enough(although in truth they were, their dad was wise and just). So she is always looking for every way to punish her brother herself. Her brother asks her to stop telling people about his past sins, they are the past and he has changed, he won't do those things anymore. But no, she thinks she is a saint to warn the world of her "dangerous" brother. She thinks that her dad would be happy to find that she has been telling the world about what a bad son he has.

Sound familiar?
Forgive me if you do not agree with my take on the story.
May God bless you today, may He show you kindness and mercy, may he show you the truth.
- N. R. M.

Anonymous said...

Great comment NRM... another take on it might be her own mother just as angry as this girl (perhaps) continually opens the wound and never let's it heal. "Oh yes look what HE did," they are quick to say. But what does she do for her daughter??

Everyday she keeps the wound open and does not let it heal.

Everyday she shows it around to all her friends.

Everyday the pain is real.

Everyday they don't let go.

Danielle said...

Amazing how we see it so differently.
N.R.M.the story about the boy that you describe would most likely be a sociopath and his behavior would only become more violent and dangerous.
It seems that you don't live in the real world. Do you not know that there are people that are actually dangerous that we should be protected from?
I get that you view Patrick differently than I do. HE IS GOOD AT WHAT HE DOES. It was that Patrick that we invited into our lives not knowing the Patrick that was lurking and waiting to make a move on his prey.

I especially appreciate the comments about my daughter from the other anon comment. Nice. Do you really believe that if our family didn't talk about what happened, the injustice, the lack of repentance STILL on Patrick's part (as shown in his actions), the fact that our former pastor (HER former pastor) actually that could have protected her is in hiding and wanted by the police would somehow whip away any consequences she will face because of the abuse and betrayal.If so, you are naive! She knows she has NOTHING to be ashamed of and that is why we can talk about it. Some of you people are REALLY scary. I hope you don't have children!

freddyeddy said...

This thread is incredibly disturbing.

If it wasn't so important to demonstrate that not all Believers are deeply troubled, naive and in denial, I would say just stop wasting electrons posting the comments.

How much of this can be used in the courtroom, assuming this goes to trial? I would be shocked if any trained "expert in social work" could read this and miss the fact that many of these people who have been and are still "sitting under this leadership" have deeply flawed views and hold them with a zealousness that is disturbing.

Danielle said...

@Fred....I totally agree and pondered for a few days prior to releasing the first anon comment (and I only released one out of the three that was sent by this individual) but do agree that it is just as important to expose the mindset (in this part of the body of Christ) along with wanting my readers to see what type of people I am dealing with. This group of individuals under the Household of Faith leadership take the scripture to an extreme that is damaging innocent children and perpetuating generations of sexual abuse. I hope someone in that group will read this and their eyes be opened!

Danielle said...

... posting a thread from FB that were made after reading the comment from N.R.M.

Tracy Marander - Sexual predators never "really" recover, and serial killers often start out by abusing animals.. This person is not living in the real world.
12 hours ago ·
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Deb Llewellyn - Thanks for reading it...crazy isn't it? Who would EVER use that metaphor?

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Tracy Marander - I can understand about forgiveness, but there are some actions that are just precursors to worse actions.

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Shawna Magrum Pederson - Punishment doesn't cure the sickness!!! There are consequences to every action.
11 hours ago ·
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Deb Llewellyn
And really, this isn't about forgiveness...it's about someone who I would not trust until he actually admitted and ask for forgiveness for everything he has done...not just the stuff he was caught doing. He needs to help his sisters get help...that would mean he would have to turn in his father, or talk his father into coming out of hiding. He would have to be in therapy, he would have to stay away from children,he would have to apologize for fighting the no-contact order that his victim wanted to feel safe, he would have to be HONEST...doesn't look like it's going to happen.See More
11 hours ago ·
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Peggy Cleary Smith Tonnema Exactly so, Deb. That person forgot the part "and the little girl wanted her brother to stay away from her, it hurt her to see him, but the little boy said "NO! I want to be by you, to watch you whenever I want!" Even though the little girl was scared, the boy thought only of his own desires."
4 hours ago ·
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Courtney Stowe - When you mix sexual predation and religion you get the super crazies.
4 hours ago ·
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Cheryll Eling Collins - Yes, and in the story, I'm sure they took the knife away from the "little boy." Unfortunately, Patrick's "weapon" is his deviant mind. Not so easily removed...
3 hours ago ·
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Deb Llewellyn AMEN, AMEN and AMEN!
3 hours ago ·
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Tonya Johnson - How offensive. Sorry N.R.M -- I think you're off a bit.
23 minutes ago ·

Anonymous said...

I read this analogy this morning and have been pondering it all day. If it wasn’t so sad, it would be laughable! Do you really think that the sexual abuse of a little girl can be equated to a cut on the arm? In order to make the story somewhat comparable, the “little boy” would have to hack off the girl’s arms and legs. Maybe then, the devastation would be on par with what Patrick has done to Danielle’s daughter. And she is not constantly re-wounding her daughter by talking about the abuse. Openness and light is what brings healing—not cowering in anonymity and darkness as Patrick and his family have done!
Do I think Patrick regrets his actions towards Danielle’s daughter? Absolutely! But not because he has genuine remorse or godly conviction. I think he misjudged Danielle and her tenacity, her willingness to fight back in the face of evil intent. If he had the time back, I think he would simply choose another victim. Someone who would toe the church line of “forgive and forget.” Someone like a few of the commenters on this blog. Someone who would let their children be victims without too much of a fuss! I think Danielle’s daughter, far from being re-victimized by her mom, is being championed by her parents, who stand by her! And not only that… are standing up for other families and children who may unwittingly come into contact with Patrick. Having all the information, at least they can choose whether they want him in their children’s lives. Danielle and her family were not given that choice.
Oh, and someone asked for the biblical basis for writing. To me, this verse sums up the whole message of her blog:
Isaiah 1:17
Say no to wrong.
Learn to do good.
Work for justice.
Help the down-and-out.
Stand up for the homeless.
Go to bat for the defenseless.

Cheryll (signing my name because I am willing to stand by my comments)