Postponed Again

Another postponement by Patrick's lawyer due to personal reasons. His lawyer is suggesting new dates in December. That's all I've got.

All Is Quiet

My spirit is quiet. The lawyers are quiet. I hope this isn't the calm before the storm, so to speak.

I am slightly anxious for the next step. My deposition is a little over a week away. Patrick's is the following day. I need to take care of the practical things involved like covering childcare and transportation for my various children's needs.

I know that powers and principalities are at work.

Please Explain

Knowing that Eddie Rojas needs to be supported by outside parties I often wonder who would give finances to aid and abed a wanted felon. I am not talking about someone who is homeschooling in a state that is against homeschoolers and trying to take his children. Nor am I talking about someone who is being persecuted for spreading the gospel or passing out bibles. But I am talking about a man who abused his authority as a spiritual leader.

Eddie Rojas knew his son, Patrick Rojas, was a sexual predator. Eddie had "caught" him twice at age 15-17 years old sexually abusing (from the evaluation, I assume his own sisters.)Yet Eddie lead others to believe his son, Patrick, was trust worthy and in particular around adolescents. Eddie allowed mentoring relationships between Patrick and children. Mind you, at this time Patrick was an adult but still completely under his fathers roof and control. Patrick was not able to do or go anywhere without Eddie's permission. Eddie knew that Patrick was very much involved with our family and interacting with our children. Eddie, my spiritual authority at the time not only encouraged our family but our church congregation to trust Patrick.

Then when the light invaded the darkness of what was happening within the walls of the Rojas family home, Eddie ran. I know that Eddie and Kathy claim to be martyrs. It is just not true. I have explained in previous posts that the state was not interested in breaking up the Rojas family. But they were very much interested in exposing just how dangerous Patrick was and holding him legally accountable and the state would have suggested some kind of support be given to the girls in the family that were his victims.

I know that when you meet Eddie he appears to be so humble and such a God fearing man. It could be easy to fall prey to his manipulation of the truth. His involvement in the crimes and betrayal committed against our child and family should not be supported by anyone, least of all, brothers and sisters in Christ. Withdrawal your support and force Eddie to return to the states to face his actions.

Otherwise, can you please explain to me why you would continue in financially supporting such a man.

How Far Should Forgiveness Go

"Condemnation is not the heart of forgiveness. It's the indispensable presupposition of it."~Miroslav Volf, Yale theologian

"Forgiveness that does not take seriously the offense against an injured party is fraudulent and cheap."~Chrisine A. Scheller, Journalist

To read the entire article that a friend sent me, click on the link below.

How Far Should Forgiveness Go?

Not Your Way

Maybe this would not be the way you would deal with crimes such as these committed against someone in your family. But it has been the way I have chosen to communicate this part of my families story. Just because it's not your way....doesn't mean it's the wrong way.

From my view, it has been my responsibility to educate and warn others, since the system failed and individuals in authority were staying silent.

I have gone outside of myself in hopes that something redeeming might come out of my families nightmare.

I could have shut down and pretended none of this happened. Pretend that all was good with our family and been living a lie. Perpetuating the damage. Sabotaging our families healing process. I could have ignored the fact that other children would be in danger, not just in general, but by someone I knew. That would have been wrong for me to do. It's just not me. But I do believe God is the ultimate judge and will without doubt bring about justice for anything not accomplished here on earth.

Punishment doesn't cure the sickness

Someone that follows my blog made this statement, "Punishment doesn't cure the sickness."

From what I have learned it is my belief that someone that is diagnosed as a pedophile or has a history of victimizing children will always and forever be a danger to children. Now it is possible for someone that is honest about their unnatural dangerous behavior to stop victimizing children but and I emphasis the but that person must take all precautions to avoid the temptation to act upon their deviant desires. The most obvious precautions is to avoid contact with children.

Because Eddie Rojas was our pastor at the time Patrick sexually abused my child and the way our church handled the entire situation, God and religion is referenced regularly on this blog. It is frustrating to me that the people that support Patrick and support that Eddie is in hiding seem to be more concerned about me forgiving Patrick and ending this blog than they are about avoiding future victims and helping the girls he has already victimized. Some want to disregard the truth of what I am writing because they feel I am in sin because they interpret what I am doing as revenge and see me as angry and bitter. I am not without sin but I do not sexually molest little children and Patrick does. I am not a danger to your children and Patrick is. I am not a wanted felon and Eddie Rojas is.

I agree punishment won't cure Patrick. Just the same, repentance won't cure Patrick. I do not believe there is a "cure" for Patrick only precautions will help Patrick. Awareness of what Patrick is capable of doing is the most powerful precaution. If you know his mode of operation you can avoid victimization. If Patrick isn't living in your community you can use my story and learn from it. Look for the red flags and listen to your gut. No relationship is worth a child being sexually molested. No community is irreplaceable. God is a big God, He isn't in only one particular church congregation.

Dear Supporters of the Rojas Family

"Cautious, careful people, always casting about to preserve their reputation and social standing, never can bring about a reform. Those who are really in earnest must be willing to be anything or nothing in the world's estimation, and publicly and privately, in season and out, avow their sympathy with despised and persecuted ideas and their advocates, and bear the consequences." ~ Susan B. Anthony


Dear Supporters of the Rojas family,

I don't REALLY care what you think about me or what you consider my motives to be for having this blog. I care that people are informed. I care that the TRUTH be known, in general and about a specific family and individual. What you do with that information is your choice.

Sincerely,
Danielle

Comment

Below is a comment that I wanted to highlight that is in response to some anonymous comments I have received on the Going Forward post. Click on the link to view the post and all the other comments.

"I read this analogy this morning and have been pondering it all day. If it wasn’t so sad, it would be laughable! Do you really think that the sexual abuse of a little girl can be equated to a cut on the arm? In order to make the story somewhat comparable, the “little boy” would have to hack off the girl’s arms and legs. Maybe then, the devastation would be on par with what Patrick has done to Danielle’s daughter. And she is not constantly re-wounding her daughter by talking about the abuse. Openness and light is what brings healing—not cowering in anonymity and darkness as Patrick and his family have done!

Do I think Patrick regrets his actions towards Danielle’s daughter? Absolutely! But not because he has genuine remorse or godly conviction. I think he misjudged Danielle and her tenacity, her willingness to fight back in the face of evil intent. If he had the time back, I think he would simply choose another victim. Someone who would toe the church line of “forgive and forget.” Someone like a few of the commenters on this blog. Someone who would let their children be victims without too much of a fuss!

I think Danielle’s daughter, far from being re-victimized by her mom, is being championed by her parents, who stand by her! And not only that… are standing up for other families and children who may unwittingly come into contact with Patrick. Having all the information, at least they can choose whether they want him in their children’s lives. Danielle and her family were not given that choice.

Oh, and someone asked for the biblical basis for writing. To me, this verse sums up the whole message of her blog:

Isaiah 1:17
Say no to wrong.
Learn to do good.
Work for justice.
Help the down-and-out.
Stand up for the homeless.
Go to bat for the defenseless."

Cheryll (signing my name because I am willing to stand by my comments)