If someone asks him, ‘What are these wounds on your body?’ he will answer, ‘The wounds I was given at the house of my friends.’ Zech 13 v 6

Monday, March 23, 2009


We were having company come over the next night so our family was tidying up our home. The family we were having over ironically enough happened to be the Rojas family. Anyway, Eric went into one of the rooms to check it out and upon inspection he found a letter inside the pillow case on one of the beds. The reaction from the child was strange so Eric came to me and we read it together.

My heart sank...there was a small torn note around the outside of the letter and here is some of what was written, "...best to tear the letter up when done reading and responding to it." ..."other notes I gave you should also be disposed of or given back to me." "This is a risky place for a mailbox....think of another place....put it there if you know I am coming or if your whole family is leaving."

Then we opened up the letter which was written on college lined paper and was two and 1/2 full pages, written 12/06......the paragraph that made me literally sick to my stomach was....

"I know that I didn't just offend you, I realize that I hurt you very deeply by what I did. I took from you something I can't ever give back......I did it because I love you. I assumed you loved me....but I guess I thought wrong".....

"......I also want to apologize for reading your diary.....since I read yours I feel as though you should read mine......"

".......I want to encourage you to grow closer to the Lord. He is more faithful than I could ever be......He has promised to be with you and never forsake you! :) "

"....P.P.S. Sometimes I feel like giving you a little gift (like gum or candy) because I want to bless you. But recently you haven't been very receptive of my efforts...."

We talked to the victim who stated their memory was very dream like and thought maybe Patrick kissed them.

We found a friend's home where our children to could go and called an emergency meeting with, at the time our pastor, Eddie (whom is the offenders father) his wife, Patrick, and one of our elders, Jim Cameron. I still wonder why we did it this way...in some ways I wish we would have called the police immediately. But in the meeting Patrick admitted to kissing the victim on the lips multiple times while the victim was asleep in their bedroom. With the note alone and the victims "dream like" minimal memory, most likely no charges would have been filed on Patrick and we would have never known just how twisted and dangerous he is. But because there were witnesses of the admission and specifically a "non partial" witness, Jim Cameron, the admission was taken seriously when we reported it to the police. When the prosecutor, Kelly Montgomery, reviewed the case she had a "gut feeling" about this one. She took the case on personally. She normally takes on the more high profile cases.

A few other things came out of the meeting that I would like to make mention of....when we read the definition of a pedophile in front of everyone immediately Eddie Rojas reached over his wife and touched Patrick on the leg and stated "one time does not make a pedophile"....and our elder, Jim Cameron, stated that he felt the "world" is too quick to label someone. Jim Cameron felt it was more like "inappropriate affection" rather than something criminal...this was the theme the elders and the Rojas family stuck with.

Another thing that always bugged me and that stuck out was when Eddie stated that he could empathize with Patrick because when Eddie was younger, 22yrs old, he had a crush on a 12yr old girl and wrote her some notes and her parents found them and told him to stop and Eddie said he did.

In that moment I pretty much sat in a chair and cried most of the time. Mrs. Rojas didn't say a word until they were leaving she hugged me and whispered, "I am so sorry it's my son." There was talk about the Rojas's disciplining Patrick and that the elders and Eddie and Patrick would need to meet to figure out what to do. Also, that the Rojas's would take this seriously. No mention of calling the police and reporting that a crime had occurred because you know (and I say this sarcastically) it is only "inappropriate affection" and "just a kiss".

Now imagine, we were sitting with men we respect, as our pastor and elder. We were in shock and disbelief and being fed that really this wasn't that big of a matter. Definitely one that needed more discussion between Eddie and the elders but nothing beyond that. We were told basically that they would be praying for us and to let them know if we needed anything.

The following 24hrs were horrible...it started to play back in our head....I kept thinking, are we making too much out of this? In the spirit of not being a "gossiper" we didn't let anyone else in our church or family know what we just discovered.

A name popped in my head, it was someone I could call and if we were making something out of nothing this person wouldn't hesitate to tell me. She has a masters in psychology and is a christian. She would know what she was talking about from a biblical world view which mattered to me. I hadn't spoken to this person in many years other than running into to her at a mutual friends birthday party or something like that....but I located her number and called.

Almost immediately after outlining the note and the "meeting" she stated that we needed to report sexual abuse. I was very hesitant and she could tell. She went on to explain a 22yr old man does not just wake up one day and fall in love with a child under 12yrs old, that Patrick most certainly had other victims with the grooming pattern he displayed towards our child. She asked if he had any sisters and expressed concern for them. (The very girls that were taken into hiding by their father to protect a pedophile.) She told me to call a sexual abuse hot line and talk anonymously with them about our situation and see if they give us the same advice, to call the police! As I'm sure my friend knew the sexual assault center did in fact say we absolutely needed to call the police!

Eric and I were still struggling and praying. When I looked at my husband and said, "if it were our neighbor that we were talking about we wouldn't hesitate calling the police." The phone rang. It was my friend who said I just want to ask you one thing "if this were your neighbor you were talking about would you even hesitate to call the police?" I was blown away. I explained that I just said that exact thing to Eric. She urged us to hang up and call 911.

That is exactly what we did!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Wait a second, he kissed your child(which I do agree is very horrible) and you call it sexual abuse? A man kisses a child and you called him a pedophile? Is that all he did? From how you have raged in other posts I thought it would had been something way more horrible than kisses.